Who told me it gets easier?
Who said that time would turn life’s gravest hurt
into a moment of dull pain?
So why does it still hurt?
Why does my heart still ache?
Why each day do I re-live those final moments
as though the world continued to turn
but left me behind to be the only witness?
Tell me why?
Oh mother, tell me why this pain is for me alone.
What did I do that was so bad, so wrong, so… so…
so impossible to word that this should be my fate?
And what a double edged blade that fate is.
Its pain and distress weakened
by the gift of seeing her again.
Feeling the touch of her hand in mine
only to lose it once again as it falls away,
taking with it another piece of my soul.
Fleck by fleck it is taken away,
though in bleeding into her the loss becomes a gain,
and nothing is submitted to the darkness.
The moment belonged to us,
its memory mine alone.